Masks

We all live lives divided.  We have two people within us, each vying for control.  One is the person we think we should be, who says and does what is safe and expected.  The other is the person we long to be, the one who lives a life beyond our wildest dreams.  We fear we cannot ever be that person, so instead we fall back on what we usually do, on what we think we are supposed to do.

The person you long to be is who you really are.  Do you wish you were more adventurous, more daring, more outgoing?  Then that is your true self, and the side of you that turns away from risk is a mask.  Do you want to be creative, or strong, or nurturing?  You would not wish for it if it was not already inside you, fighting for your attention.

Does your true self feel far away, impossible to cultivate?  Begin with something small.  Start slowly; allow yourself to practice being who you were meant to be.  One of the happiest days of my life was when I decided to simply accept that I was who I wanted to be, that all the qualities I longed for were already mine.  I began by pretending that was true, by acting as if I was the person I most wanted to be.  The role fit like a glove.  I found that, once you begin, it is surprisingly easy to be who you really are.

The only trick is this–you cannot force yourself into a role you (or others) think you “should” play.  It will not fit; it will not make you feel happy, peaceful or free.  But when you play the role that is authentic to you, you find yourself growing into your dreams.

Loving Now

Would you be happy?  Then love where you are now.  Not later.  Not yesterday.  Not if only something was different.  Now, as it is, in all its imperfect perfection.

Wherever you are, however you feel, there is something to love.  And when you focus on that, rather than on what you think is wrong, you allow your awareness of love and beauty to grow.

When we focus on the love and beauty that is in front of us, we stop sending our energy into the past or future.  We do our part and let the Universe do the rest.  We accept the abundance.  We get out of the way.

The future is not under our control.  But in this moment, we have a choice.  We can appreciate what is, or we can push it away.  What will you choose?

Trust love.  Know that all you have is all you need, and that if what you want does not appear, it is because something better will.  The shadows of the past and future are not real, but this moment is.  This moment is sacred.  Choose to fill it with love.

Following The Turquoise Path

It was the windiest day I’ve ever seen.  I was driving through Winslow, Arizona with my mother, sister and aunt.  This was not a usual windstorm–the wind was so powerful that the air was thick with dust, trees were bent over and the interstate was shut down.  We were stuck, in a town that seemed to offer nothing but wind.  Businesses were boarded up, gas stations abandoned.  What was once a thriving railway stop was now empty, all but deserted.

We were tired, hungry and thirsty.  The wind buffeted the sides of the car so fiercely that staying where we were did not feel safe.  Yet we did not know where to go.  That was when I saw a sign, an arrow pointing towards “The Turquoise Room.”

Most of the town’s restaurants and shops appeared to be closed; there was no way to know that this one would be any different.  But I have always loved the shades of blue and green, turquoise most of all.  These colors call to me, sing to me.  So I asked my mother, who was driving, to follow the sign.  It led us to a beautiful old hotel, housing a restaurant and bar called the Turquoise Room.  It was a place of beauty within the windstorm.  A place of peace.  We settled in, and were served food and drinks just before the electricity died.  As we enjoyed our meal by candlelight, a friendly waiter told us about another route we could take to Sedona, one through the mountains, out of the wind.

Intuition speaks to each of us differently, in ways unique to who we are and what we love.  In ways that only we can hear.  But when you learn to listen, when you learn to follow, you will find yourself led to exactly where you need to be.

May you find your own turquoise path.  May it lead you to joy.

Worthy

There is a reason many of us are unable to see how much we are loved, how much the universe supports us, how we are surrounded by beauty.  It is because we don’t think we deserve that much love, that much wonder.  How could we?  We are given every breath we take, we are given the freshness of a new morning, the taste of water, the stability of the earth beneath us.  Why should all this love be ours, what could we ever do to deserve it, and what could we ever give back?

And so we think it isn’t real, or isn’t good enough, or we rush off into a million distractions without appreciating the gift of the moment.  The truth is always with you.  The universe needs you as much as you need it.  You could not exist without sunlight, wind, water, earth; they could not exist without you.  You are precious.  You are irreplaceable.  You are part of the mystery, the dance, the magic.

You do not need to do anything to prove yourself worthy–you already are.  There is nothing you need to do or be.  Notice the love around you, appreciate the gifts you are given and give thanks for the beauty without and within.  Or don’t–they will still be there; truth will not change.  We give because it opens our hearts to more joy, we appreciate the world because it creates more joy and beauty.

This is who you are:  Loved.  Precious.  Infinite.  The more you let yourself relax into that knowledge, the more peace you will find.

Let the beauty you are be what you do.

Ask For What You Want

We are divine.  We are spiritual beings.  We are powerful.  But we are not mind-readers.  That is why we must ask for what we want.

No matter how much someone loves you, how long they’ve known you, or how deeply they care, they cannot read your mind.  We often fall into the trap of expecting others to figure out what we want.  We say things like “if you really knew me” or “if you really loved me” you would know what it is I want.  We make it a test of love, a test of faith.  And yet–don’t we usually demand that others figure out what we want because we ourselves aren’t sure?  Or, worse yet, because we are afraid to speak up and be honest about our true desires?

Instead of taking the time to ask ourselves what it is we really desire, we focus on all the things we don’t want, and blame others for not solving our problems.  But who could?  Who could ever know what it is we truly desire better than we do?  No one sees the world quite the same way you do.  No one else has your unique heart, mind and soul.  No one is better equipped than you to determine what you want out of life.

Don’t expect others to be mind-readers; don’t pretend you are one.  Take the time to investigate your true and deep desires, and then ask for what you want.

Heroes

Heroes travel on the wind, as we all do.  What is it that makes heroes heroes?  They are courageous, able to choose love even when fear and pain surround them.  They know who they are, can sense their mission, their purpose, even when all seems dark and cold.  They may stumble and lose their way, they may forget and they may doubt.  Yet when the road is darkest, when all seems lost, they find their way.  They stand up, walk on, continue.  When the world becomes dark and quiet, then they can listen, then they can see.  They rise again, and again, and continue on.

We are heirs of a mythical past, and guardians of forgotten truth.  The world calls to each of us, over and over again.  Some are waiting for the call, intently listening for it.  Others are awakened suddenly by it.  Still others resist, ignore, deny the call.  The tapestry of the future is woven all the same.

We are the chosen ones.  That is why we are here.  We would not have been born if we did not have a unique, irreplaceable, powerful purpose for being here.  The universe does not waste space, does not make mistakes.  Do not fear over-reaching; you cannot.  Do not ask if you are worthy of the path you see before you; you could not see it if it were not meant for you.  You are divine, an immortal at play in a human world.  Ride the wave that moves between your humanity and your divinity, play the part you long to play.  Embrace all the facets of your starlit soul.

You will always be given the tools you need, once you begin the quest.  Such is the way of the world, always and without fail.  Even your failures will provide the key to your freedom.  Such is the way of love.

What Women Want

There is a story that answers the oldest of questions:  what do women want?

A young and handsome knight of Camelot, named Gawain, set out to find the answer to save King Arthur from losing his throne.  It sounds perilous–an entire kingdom dependent on determining what women want.  But for a true knight, all things are possible.  Answers always present themselves to those who honestly seek them.

For Sir Gawain, the answer presented itself in the guise of an old woman.  She appeared in the forest, withered by age and sickness, and asked him for food.  Being a kind as well as noble knight, Gawain made a place for her by the warm fire and gave her his food and drink.  In gratitude, she told Gawain that she knew of his quest and would give him the answer he sought, if he would take her back to Camelot and make her his wife.

This was a harsh fate for a strong, handsome young man, the prize of the court and the favorite of all the beautiful young ladies.  But Arthur’s kingdom was at stake, and so Gawain could do nothing but agree.

Upon his promise to marry her, she told him the secret of what all women want–to have their own way.  But the story does not end there.

Gawain and his promised bride returned to Camelot, and the entire court grieved at seeing the young man bound to a haggard old woman, wise though she might be.  But the wedding was duly planned and celebrated in lavish style, and that night Gawain joined his new bride in their wedding chamber.

When the court had retired and the couple were alone, a miraculous thing occurred–the wise woman was surrounded by glowing light, and then her form shifted and changed into that of a stunning young beauty with flowing blonde hair and cornflower blue eyes.

“I was cursed by an evil magician,” the lady said, “and forced to walk the world as an old woman before my time, until and unless a knight of Arthur’s court would make me his wife.  But I am afraid the curse is not completely broken, and a choice is before you, my husband.  You must choose–would you have me be beautiful by day, when all the court could see me, or at night, when we are alone together in our bedchamber?  What, my husband, would you desire?”

“I cannot decide,” Gawain declared, after a moment’s thought.  “You must choose what is more pleasing to you.”

“And now,” cried his lady, “the curse is well and truly broken, and I am free to appear as my true self at all hours of the day, for you have given me what all women wish for–the ability to have my own way.”

It is not only women, of course, who long to have their own way.  For what does it mean, to have one’s own way, but to be one’s true and authentic self, at all times and in all places?  This is the gift of love that breaks all curses, and sets us free.

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